Submitted by Whoopsie (Some City, Some State) on 03.31.17
This literally just happened. I went to a potluck and I was eating these wraps my friend made. It had lettuce, ground meat, tomato, and her "Taco Sauce" she said she made out of mayo and other spices. It was amazinggggg. But then an hour later, my stomach gurgled and then I asked what was in the sauce. She said cream cheese and taco seasoning. I then reminded her I was lactose and she said, "Whoops." First thing you should know, I'm shit shy. Meaning I can't shit unless I'm completely alone or at my house. So being at a person's house I had just met, I'm not going to just let a nuke drop in their home. So I held it in. An hour goes by. Fine. Another hour goes by. I'm holding on.... Then we get to the friend's house (who made the taco sauce) because I had forgotten my purse. I told my boyfriend (of one year) to go get my purse because if I stood up, that was it. He comes back and I bolt it for the house. I manage to get the front door unlocked. Then I'm running up the stairs, but the force of my steps hitting the stairs and the intense pressure I felt was too much. I shit my pants right as I'm 2 steps away from the Washroom door. It wasn't that bad. I'd say the stain was a good hand size but it didn't manage to leak through. I made it to the toilet just has the full force began. I texted my boyfriend what happened and I quickly got into the shower. I cleaned up and my boyfriend gave me his work jacket to cover myself. I was completely mortified. Like I said, I'm shit shy. So he would always tell me it's okay to shit at his house but I refuse. So my first time shitting around my boyfriend was me shitting my pants. He keeps telling me it's fine but I'm so embarrassed and I really don't want any physical human interaction for at least a week.
Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 2971 Not So Much 2967
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