Submitted by shorty (Some City, Some State) on 08.08.15
About 30 minutes before my shift ended at work I was struck by the worst bout of explosive diahrea I've ever encountered, I literaly checked the toilet bowel to make sure I had'nt cracked it. I felt completely fine afterwards so jumped in my car and headed home after work. About halfway home I felt my stomache cramping up again and sped up trying to make the next off ramp to find a restroom to use. And of course, like in my worst nightmare, a state police trooper pulls in behind me with his lights flashing. As I'm pulling over to the side of the road I'm clamping my butt cheaks together so tight I could crush a diamond. I could feel the impending bowel explosion building, my first thought was to jump out the door, drop my drawers and let er rip but as I watched the cop approaching in the rear view mirror decided maybe not. Then, about the time he reached my door all hell broke loose. It felt like the cap blowing off of a fire hydrant with me sitting on top of it. For a brief moment, the embarassement of shitting myself seemed like nothing due to the extreme relief I felt. But a very brief moment it was, because as soon as the trooper stuck his face in my window he literaly stepped back and pucked all over himself.
Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 462 Not So Much 471
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