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Submitted by Rod Dangerfield (Some City, Some State) on 05.23.15

To get things started, I'm a legendary farter. People love to hear me do it because I'm just so good at it. Anyway, last night I was sitting on my back patio watching the sprinklers & I felt a colossal fart brewing. So I got my iPhone out & put it on record. I leaned over, held the phone down to my butt to record the fart, & then BAM! Huge fart! Only there was a problem....it was a shart. I shit all in my shorts. Now get this....I go commando. I was wearing some mesh Russell athletic shorts. What I thought was gonna be a massive fart turned into an atomic shit explosion. Some of it made it through my mesh shorts & got on my hand & iPhone. Now guess what....I can't get the shit smelling foulness out of my iPhone!!

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 349 Not So Much 402


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