Submitted by MosquitoControl (Some City, NC) on 05.08.14
Well I'm a driver for the county. I was getting pretty hungry because I've been eating slim here lately. So I decided to get some Papa Johns. Got a pepperoni jalapeño and sausage pizza with garlic sauce. It wasn't good. Ate a couple pieces and went on with my route. About 7 minutes later felt a little funny. I went ahead and relieved some built up pressure. I
Could feel it coming down the pipes so I started thinking I got to find a bathroom NOW!
I drive the same route every night so I know where the crappers and quiet places were and I wasn't within 2-3 minutes of one. So I started flying to the closest place I was going 60 in a 35 at one point. Too late, as I was heading there no matter how hard I resisted or clenched it started flowing out. Once the gates opened up I couldn't close them there was just too much pressure. As soon as I finally arrived at a porta John I had just finished my entire exorcism in my shorts.
I bent over and crabbed over to the John to clean up. Thankfully I decided to wear briefs for a change. The briefs held everything like a diaper and made or simple and not near as messy as boxers.
Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 754 Not So Much 770
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